CROIX en TERNOIS

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. It was a time of reason and a time of madness,,, What the Dickens ! The alarm jangled me from my podium and champagne dreams at 3:30. It was still dark outside. This would require two cups of coffee, maybe three, it was too early to say. Doing a passable imitation of a Grizzly with a sore arse I informed Ludo my musical companion for this trip it was time to rise n shine. Or, more accurately, that it was time to send the orchestra home. All night I had been treated to Ludo's interpretation of the 1812 for arse and snout. The swirl of green fog, ankle deep on the carpet around him an unrequested encore. Lucky he can cook, as a navigator he couldn't find his arse with both hands, even if the rest of the world only has to follow their nose.

Ah L'Belle France, home of Descarte, Rousseaux, Pastuer (the guy who invented milk) Gaugin amd Monet. True they also gave us Sasha Distell and have a habit of eating that which we tend to keep as pets. But they also gave us Croix en Ternois home to the Fast Hamsters annual booze cruise/duty free excursion and race w/end.

My w/end got off to a good start in race one when the brake lever started coming back to the bar. Alas the curse of the pink tutu of shame stikes again and I pulled off. I replaced the milky goo in my brakes with a fine french vintage dot5. Race two was a slightly ginger affair as I half expected my brakes to go off again. However they were fine and I even managed a new PB of 1.09.

Sat night over a couple of beers it the company of Jock, The Colonel, Lin and Jan - who makes more sense after a bottle of vodka, it was confirmed that Lloyd hadnt made it. Not altogether surprised by this, I expect we might see him turn out next year. The Americans have a habit of being a year or two late for major European events.

Sunday, race one was so much better than Saturday. I made a good start, ok so all that that means is that I wasnt last into the first corner. By race two I am one year into tzr racing and a new PB of 1.07.26, six seconds faster than last year. I ducked out of the champagne reception, the hordes of adoring fans, groupies and agents for the major race teams to make a quick exit for the ferry.

I actually only made it as far as the motorway services before my vans clutch gave up the ghost. This was the roughest part of the w/end, a real test of character. My breakdown insurance/recovery vehicle came and carted the van off to the nearest Renault dealer. We were forced to endure a Premiere class hotel, surviving on a meal cooked by a chef with only one Michelin star and wash it down with a bottle of non vintage red - it was hell.

And so its onto, well nothing really. Brands isnt until Sept so for my next fix I'll be out at Lydden on the 21/22 Aug. Donning a pudding bowl helmet, goggles and a "What Ho! Algy." Biggles stick on moustache, Team Dick Disaterously will be flying in formation on my super dooper Suzuki Super Six. Should be a laugh, its still fitted with the std. feeble drum.Tea and biccies will be freely dispensed from my Luxury Race Team Transporter H.Q. This is George Watson, for Back O' the grid, in two classes. See you at Brands.

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